EXCLUSIVE Sneak Peek of "Untitled Rubén Amaro Biopic" Screenplay!

by FuquaManuel on Aug 13, 2010 10:45 AM EDT

As many of you may know, the highly-anticipated film adaptation of Michael Lewis' book, Moneyball, is currently in production. The film features a star-studded cast--including Brad Pitt as A's GM Billy Beane, Jonah Hill as assistant GM Paul DePodesta (I admit, this is a strange choice), and Philip Seymour Hoffman as manager Art Howe, among others--that all but ensures it will be a super smash box office hit (okay, maybe not). With the forthcoming release of Moneyball, the demand in the biz for front-office baseball drama screenplays is obviously at an all-time high.

What does this have to do with the Phillies, you might be wondering. Well, like any self-respecting Jew, I employ my own personal Hollywood insider to keep me apprised of the latest showbiz scuttlebutt. The other day, my guy contacted me with something that I believe will be of great interest to you all.

Thus, without any further adieu, after the jump I present to you FIVE leaked pages from the script of what to this point is only known as the "Untitled Rubén Amaro Biopic":

Click pages to enlarge

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My sources weren't able to get me pages

But they’re pretty sure the working title is “Smug: The Ruben Amaro Story”

Honor is no substitute for victory.

by The Dark on Aug 13, 2010 10:49 AM EDT reply actions

This could work. Or just simply “Smug”.

Pessimism of the intellect, optimism of the will.

by FuquaManuel on Aug 13, 2010 3:34 PM EDT up reply actions

This is quite a debut.

by taco pal on Aug 13, 2010 10:50 AM EDT reply actions

I didn’t have to do anything! Thank the still unnamed screenwriter (I have this nagging sense that it is one of the Cohen brothers) and my Hollywood insider.

Pessimism of the intellect, optimism of the will.

by FuquaManuel on Aug 13, 2010 10:54 AM EDT up reply actions

“…if I gave a shit about your silly numbers, I would have hired a calculator.”

Bravo, good sir. The only possible accuracy flaw being the dubiousness of Chuck Lamar knowing what xFIP is. Anyway, I’m thinking maybe Benicio del Toro for the Amaro role.

Like TP said, quite a debut here, FM.

by PhillyFriar on Aug 13, 2010 10:58 AM EDT via mobile reply actions

Somebody had to be the “voice of reason.”

Pessimism of the intellect, optimism of the will.

by FuquaManuel on Aug 13, 2010 11:03 AM EDT up reply actions

Call it artistic license.

by taco pal on Aug 13, 2010 11:08 AM EDT up reply actions

And thanks!

Pessimism of the intellect, optimism of the will.

by FuquaManuel on Aug 13, 2010 11:03 AM EDT up reply actions

I’m sure Robert Hegyes is available…

by taco pal on Aug 13, 2010 11:10 AM EDT up reply actions

Javier Bardem might work, too.

http://www.thegoodphight.com

by WholeCamels on Aug 13, 2010 11:22 AM EDT up reply actions

That guy can act. So can Benicio. Both would probably make Ruben a sympathetic figure to the average movie-goes.

by phillyinportland on Aug 15, 2010 2:14 AM EDT up reply actions

Strong!!! Way to bring it right out of the gate. Hopefully you don’t regress in your subsequent posts leading us all to debate whether you were brought up too early and need more time commenting on the game threads to hone your craft :)

by Boundforbeach on Aug 13, 2010 11:03 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs

Well played!

by WanderingMoses on Aug 13, 2010 11:04 AM EDT up reply actions

Quite a debut indeed.

Who’s going to play Cholly? I nominate Christian Bale to play Utley, and Clint Eastwood to play Moyer. But who’s going to play Cholly?

by Phrozen on Aug 13, 2010 11:05 AM EDT reply actions

The real question is, will anyone who plays Polanco need a head attachment? You know, for realism’s sake.

by WanderingMoses on Aug 13, 2010 11:06 AM EDT up reply actions

Frank Langella?

by taco pal on Aug 13, 2010 11:07 AM EDT up reply actions

Chris Cooper.

Pessimism of the intellect, optimism of the will.

by FuquaManuel on Aug 13, 2010 11:07 AM EDT up reply actions

The guy who played Pappy McDaniel in O Brother, Where Art Thou?

by taco pal on Aug 13, 2010 11:07 AM EDT up reply actions

Good point, if it is in fact a Cohen Bros. production, then that would make sense.

Pessimism of the intellect, optimism of the will.

by FuquaManuel on Aug 13, 2010 11:08 AM EDT up reply actions

My nominee is this guy

by FearTheTurtIe on Aug 13, 2010 11:17 AM EDT up reply actions

Who played Pappy McDaniel. Damn. I know him from Rescue Me. Good suggestion tp.

by FearTheTurtIe on Aug 13, 2010 11:29 AM EDT up reply actions

Charlie’s an older manager but Durning’s like almost 90. I like Frank Langella.

by phillyinportland on Aug 15, 2010 2:16 AM EDT up reply actions

John Goodman

by Cormican on Aug 15, 2010 8:55 PM EDT up reply actions

Wilford Brimley

as Cholly… afterall he has managerial experience!

by PSUcup1 on Aug 13, 2010 11:20 AM EDT up reply actions

Pessimism of the intellect, optimism of the will.

by FuquaManuel on Aug 13, 2010 11:52 PM EDT up reply actions

If we did it as an animated movie, we could get whoever does Boomhauer’s voice on King of the Hill to adapt it a little.

by taco pal on Aug 13, 2010 11:22 AM EDT up reply actions

I don’t know if Baez is Charlie’s “guy”, though.

by WanderingMoses on Aug 13, 2010 11:05 AM EDT reply actions

Probably not, but it makes for good drama!

Pessimism of the intellect, optimism of the will.

by FuquaManuel on Aug 13, 2010 11:16 AM EDT up reply actions

Lou Diamond Phillips

as RAJ?

by PSUcup1 on Aug 13, 2010 11:23 AM EDT reply actions

I like Jacob Vargas as RAJ. Maybe a little on the young side though.

by FearTheTurtIe on Aug 13, 2010 11:28 AM EDT up reply actions

Good call on Lou Diamond Phillips.. and how about Andy Griffith as Cholly?

by LondonPhillie on Aug 13, 2010 2:08 PM EDT up reply actions

Do any opposing ballparks play the Andy Griffith Show theme song when Charlie goes out to the mound? That would be kind of funny.

by taco pal on Aug 13, 2010 2:17 PM EDT up reply actions

Agreed with PhillyFriar – love the line about hiring a calculator. Nice post FM!

by David S. Cohen on Aug 13, 2010 11:32 AM EDT reply actions

Best line was:

“I like those Mercedes cars.”

Far and away. Perfect, perfect stereotype of Charlie. Sitting there sort of mindlessly, chomping on the gum, and then spitting out that line? Picture perfect.

Remember the Phitans

by RememberthePhitans on Aug 13, 2010 11:41 AM EDT up reply actions

Or pitch perfect, even. Damn.

Remember the Phitans

by RememberthePhitans on Aug 13, 2010 11:44 AM EDT up reply actions

Ha. Thanks!

Pessimism of the intellect, optimism of the will.

by FuquaManuel on Aug 13, 2010 11:47 AM EDT up reply actions

Thanks David!

Pessimism of the intellect, optimism of the will.

by FuquaManuel on Aug 13, 2010 11:47 AM EDT up reply actions

"Amaro waves his hand dismissively"

HAHAHA. nice work!

We could get Vinnie Chase to play RAJ.

Chase Utley is so good that on one pitch he stole second, third and the shortstop's hat.

by ajr142 on Aug 13, 2010 2:17 PM EDT reply actions

“There is an awkward pause.”

Go ‘head, I’m listening.

It is all about the fine details like that. Mengke Bateer also fine. It is like I am sitting in the room with them. And with Pat the Bat mere days away from landing in Philadelphia, I have got to get my creative juices flowing again. As does he, but that’s a given.

by Wet Luzinski on Aug 13, 2010 3:19 PM EDT reply actions

Over/Under

Pat the Bat and creative juices appearing the in the same sentence.

by j reed on Aug 15, 2010 11:39 PM EDT up reply actions

I look forward to Monty Python’s film about the Mets front office.

by Cormican on Aug 13, 2010 3:43 PM EDT reply actions 1 recs

“We apologise for the fault in the team for the last three years. Those responsible have been sacked. Actually no, they haven’t.”

by taco pal on Aug 13, 2010 4:02 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs

Too funny!

by dannijd on Aug 14, 2010 12:44 AM EDT up reply actions

LOL

Thank-you for my laugh for the day!

by dannijd on Aug 14, 2010 12:44 AM EDT reply actions

Any possiblity for 5 pages of “deleted E! True Hollywood Story scenes” involving RAJ and Burrell at some strip club when Pat and his bat comes back to Philly?

by j reed on Aug 15, 2010 7:57 PM EDT reply actions