In the interest of "search engine optimization," let me get this out of the way: "sarah palin sex tape charlie sheen free download adjustment bureau phillies." 

Okay, on to baseball. 

The Phillies mollywopped the Orioles in Grapefruit league play today, 13-5. One must suspect that the Orioles were still reeling from the drug-related arrest of local hero Felicia "Snoop" Pearson of The Wire fame (Yeeeeeerrrr). When reached by phone "in the cut," convicted murderer Chris Partlow had no comment. Ryan Howard (4), Gross Load (1), John Mayberry (4), and Raul Ibanez (1) each homered. Ibanez also added a double and a single to finish the day 3/3. Other notable batting lines included Victorino's 2/2 with a BB and a double and Delwyn Young's 3/5. Cliff Lee was a bit shaky in his 3 IP, allowing 5 H, 3 ER. No big deal. Finally, Brad Lidge struggled yet again. In his inning of work he allowed 3 H, 2 ER, 1 BB with no strikeouts. 

Fantasy Leaguers: don't forget that the draft is on Sunday at 4 PM. 

Also, we are getting closer to our goal of 500 Facebook "likes". So, if you haven't yet, like us on Facebook for a chance to win a free copy of the Mike Missinelli-approved 2011 Maple Street Press Phillies Annual.

Phillies:

Lee: Halladay the ace of the aces
You're the best. No, you're the best. You hang up first. No, you hang up first.

Cliff Lee chose Philly because the Yankees are getting older.
Everyone's getting older. It's a fact. But more importantly, I can't believe we are still talking about why Cliff Lee chose Philadelphia.

Full List of Phillies Sent Down
Later, dudes.

BtB on the Phillies
Props to Crashburn Alley for taking up this article, which I had some problems with as well.

Some steps Phillies could take to acquire Rangers' Michael Young
OH MY GOD. THIS IS LIKE THE SARAH PALIN OF IDEAS.

Only Three Weeks Till Opening Day!
Simple yet awesome.

Fastball, Fastball, Fastball: Getting Lidge on Track
Well, that might explain it.

More after the jump...

Elsewhere in baseball:

Developing Plate Discipline
It ain't easy.

Should Pujols’ Christianity affect his asking price?
I can't wait until there's an article titled "Should Ryan Braun's Judaism affect his asking price?"

Cool: Back to Baseball
This is awesome. Check it out.

Spring Training 2011 Question Of The Day: Atlanta Braves
Rob Neyer takes a look at the Barves.

Oliver Perez is throwing a bullpen session
lulz. Ollie can't even strike out an imaginary, one-legged Chase Utley.