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DEAR DIARY: OMG!! Cole maimed and SIR-JOGS-A-LOT SUX!!! WTF!!


Dear diary,

Sorry its been so long, but school is out and i've been in wildwood with NO F'in WIFI!! OMG! How did people live B4 the internet?? No idea!!  (Bright side, been gourgin' on FF and Lemonade!! YUM!!) Found this hotspot so I'm back!!  I met this guy, Rex (I know, so cool Name!!) too! He goes to Rutgers, but the rents think hes still at Holy Cross in Delran!! LOL. they would freak cause he's like 21, and we TOTALLY got into BARS (no card!! WHOO HOO!!) !! But he plays for them (SS!!) and he has tix thurs!! to the SAWX GAME!! CFW!! SO EXCITED!!

Just hope DIPSHITDUBEE ptiches Cole and not KK!! Lat time KK pitched and I went I almost threw up my cheesteak in my mouth like twice!! He MAKES ME CRAZY!!

HOPEFULLY HIS FACE IS BETTER BY THEN! lol!! Poor baby!! (That ump totally couldn't stop staring at his CHIN on the Balk!! (LOL). WTF is up with all the balks anyway?? I don't really know what one is, but COLE TOTALLY DIDN'T DO IT!!When I saw it I freaked!! My mom thought I was having a seizure or sumthin I screamed so hard. If he has a scar I'LL DIE!! It's bad enough he gets NO F'IN run support!! (FAT ASS SPANKEE SaBADthia got to 10 wins 1st!! BOOOOO!!) Oh well, at least it wasn't Roy (Barf!! OVERRRATED!!). But he totally should have won B/C.....

DOM BROWN IS A LIL' BITCH! WHY DON'T YOU F'In RUN!! OMG!! KILL ME NOW!! How does he jog there!! I would totally bench him for BennyFresh!! (CLUTCH+HOT=OMFG!!) It's like, HELLO, maybe if your hands weren't trying to be a frickin airplane wing you could maybe get on base!! He looks like he's trying to swordfight, not hit!! LOL!! Its 2011 not 1511, Sir JOGS-A-LOT!!  HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE!! I can't wait for us to sign Hunter Pence and send him back to LHV!! HUNTER PENCE IS SO FINE!! HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE!! All he does is WALK! BORING!! (OBP+OVERRATED!!)

And ShaneDHD!! Take a NAP after the game Brah!! LOL LOL LOL!!! he was so lucky that the guy hit a real hit not a BITCH hit to the IF, or I would have pbeen LIVID!! Seriously, TAKE YOUR MEDS B$ THE GAME!!  and WTF is that thing he chews on in the OF? does it stop him from trying to swallow his tounge by mistake? LOL!! It looks like a cow patty!! LOLOLOL!! Hello? Bubblegum??

 

BTW, wtf kind of name is COCO?? Maybe I'll name my kid ALPHA BITS!! LOL!!

Also, if the team is called the ATHLETICS, why is everyone SO F'in FAT?? did you SEE their pitcher? He looked like my 9 year old fat ass btrother on steroids!! Seriously, you could take him FAT JOE, CHUNK, CC SaBADTHIA, and that old guy who has Vampire Blood on the SPANKEE'S (Colon? LOLOLOL his last niame is ASS!!) and have an all FAT TEAM rotation!! that would be HILARIOUS!!

Hopefully, Stutes (Yummy) just had a bad game. I think he was just distracted B/C peeps are mad he won't verify his twitter. IT'S TOTALLY HIM!! Leave him alone, peeps!! #mikestutes. should be #SAMSOMSTUTES cause his locks are f'in MAGIC!!  SO HOT!! #dreamboat

NEWAY, gotta go hit the beach with REX!. RH is pitching so I'M NOT WATCHING. If he gets to 10 today, B/C of Sir Jogs-a-lot. I will be pissed!! SHOULD HAVE BEEN COLE!!  I'm so torn cause I don't want us to lose, but I don't want Roy to get to 10!! hopefully he'll get a ND and STUTES will get the W!!

Gotta go! CLIFF ON TUESDAY!! (He has been on fire!! but that another entry!!)

luv,

PHRANIE!!

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