via Red Horse Tutoring
It was but a month ago when you reported to camp for Spring Training, a gaggle of wet-behind-the ears, My Little Pony backpack wearing rookies, hungry prospects and wily veterans. During this month, under the watchful eye of coaches Wet Luzinski, Phrozen and TwistyWristy, you've added new picks to your repertoire and perhaps most importantly, gained more control over your dart throwing. With opening day less than 24 hours away, the time has come to find out whether you've got the right stuff to crack the opening day roster, whether you'll be sent down to the Psychic Hotline league to work on your prognosticating or if unfortunately, you've been cut from the team.
| Event #1 - Starting pitcher retires every batter faced before being pulled. |
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Date - February 29.5 |
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Result - Under |
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| On February 29th Austin Hyatt faced six batters in two innings, striking out three. Despite achieving this feat, Hyatt, much to his surprise, would not be on the opening day roster. |
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Over - Borg_Queen, Carnac the Magnificent, Joecatz, Missing Jamie Moyer, philsandthrills, Rujasu, TwistyWristy |
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Under - FanSince1993, Phrozen |
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Never - |
| Event #2 - Player in the "best shape of his life." |
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Date - March 2 |
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Result - Never |
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| On April 4th, Wednesday morning, Ruben Amaro Jr. was infuriated to learn that nary a single Phillie felt that he was in the "best shape of his life". Sources report that he yelled "What the hell are we paying you for!" to Strength and Coordinating Coordinator, Dong Lien. |
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Over - Carnac the Magnificent, philsandthrills, Phrozen, Rujasu, TwistyWristy, veni Vidi Vinci, Wet Luzinski |
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Under - Borg_Queen, FanSince1993, Joecatz, kmrblue1027, Missing Jamie Moyer |
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Never - |
| Event #3 - First base hit by Freddy Galvis, Pete Orr, Tuffy Gosewisch or Juan Pierre. |
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Date - March 4.5 |
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Result - Under |
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| Tuffy Gosewisch gets the first hit of the spring with a double. |
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Over - |
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Under - Borg_Queen, Carnac the Magnificent, FanSince1993, Joecatz, Missing Jamie Moyer, philsandthrills, Phrozen, Rujasu, TwistyWristy |
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Never - |
| Event #4 - First starting CF other than Shane Victorino. |
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Date - March 7.5 |
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Result - Under |
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| On March 4th, Tyson Gillies gets the start in center field after Shane Victorino was scratched late for personal reasons. In other news, local Wildlife Pet Store owner Amy Knopes reported that a few of the stores baby squirrels had escaped. "That's quite a coincidence." Gillies remarked, when asked for comment. |
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Over - |
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Under - Borg_Queen, FanSince1993, Joecatz, kmrblue1027, Missing Jamie Moyer, philsandthrills, Phrozen, Rujasu, TwistyWristy, veni Vidi Vinci, Wet Luzinski |
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Never - Carnac the Magnificent |
| Event #5 - Jim Thome first starts at first base. |
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Date - March 11.5 |
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Result - Over |
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| On March 25th, Jim Thome's first start on first base in nearly five years was overshadowed by well-known attention monger, Chase Utley, who addressed the media about nothing. Jim Thome had only good words for Utley. "Not Chase's fault, he can't help but be a memorable guy. In fact, it's actually an honor to be overshadowed by the same guy who overshadowed the World Series with his 'World F*cking Champions quote'". |
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Over - Carnac the Magnificent, Phrozen |
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Under - Borg_Queen, FanSince1993, Joecatz, kmrblue1027, Missing Jamie Moyer, philsandthrills, Rujasu, TwistyWristy, veni Vidi Vinci, Wet Luzinski |
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Never - |
| Event #6 - Jim Thome commits first error at first base. |
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Date - March 11.5 |
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Result - Never |
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| As a token of appreciation towards philsandthrills and Rujasu for having confidence in him, Jim Thome didn't commit any errors during his tenure on 1st base. |
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Over - Borg_Queen, Carnac the Magnificent, FanSince1993, Joecatz, kmrblue1027, Missing Jamie Moyer, Phrozen, TwistyWristy, Wet Luzinski |
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Under - veni Vidi Vinci |
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Never - philsandthrills, Rujasu |
| Event #7 - Jimmy Rollins' first stolen base. |
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Date - March 14.5 |
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Result - Under |
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| On March 5th, Jimmy Rollins steals not one, not three, but TWO bases! In a row! |
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Over - Borg_Queen, Carnac the Magnificent, Joecatz, philsandthrills, TwistyWristy, Wet Luzinski |
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Under - FanSince1993, kmrblue1027, Missing Jamie Moyer, Phrozen, Rujasu |
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Never - veni Vidi Vinci |
| Event #8 - Chase Utley's first homerun. |
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Date - March 14.5 |
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Result - Never |
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| Chase Utley's knee had other ideas, stubbornly declaring it was too old for these homerun shenanigans and wanted to retire to Florida like Dobbs. |
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Over - Carnac the Magnificent, Joecatz, kmrblue1027, Wet Luzinski |
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Under - Borg_Queen, FanSince1993, Missing Jamie Moyer, philsandthrills, Phrozen, Rujasu, TwistyWristy, veni Vidi Vinci |
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Never - |
| Event #9 - Phillies face a lineup including both a Phormer Phillie and a Phormer Phuture Phillie. |
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Date - March 15.5 |
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Result - Under |
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| On March 6th, playing against Toronto, the Phillies faced the delightful duo of Anthony Gose and Ben Francisco. While they combined for a fly-out and strikeout, the Phillies could regret their decision to get rid of them because it was completely obvious that with more at-bats, they would've hit several home runs and probably a grand slam or two. |
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Over - Carnac the Magnificent, Missing Jamie Moyer |
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Under - FanSince1993, Joecatz, philsandthrills, Phrozen, TwistyWristy, Wet Luzinski |
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Never - Borg_Queen, kmrblue1027, Rujasu, veni Vidi Vinci |
| Event #10 - First save by Michael STOOTES or Phillipe Aumont. |
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Date - March 19.5 |
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Result - Never |
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| Michael Stute's and Phillipe Amount's big dreams of an exciting paragraph dedicated to an adrenaline-pumping, heart racing, bases loaded, only up by one with no-outs in the bottom of the 9th inning save will have to wait a little longer. |
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Over - Borg_Queen, kmrblue1027, TwistyWristy, veni Vidi Vinci |
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Under - Carnac the Magnificent, FanSince1993, philsandthrills, Phrozen, Rujasu, Wet Luzinski |
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Never - Joecatz, Missing Jamie Moyer |
| Event #11 - Joe Savery plays a position other than pitcher. |
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Date - March 23.5 |
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Result - Never |
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| Savery was far too busy doing more important things than playing other positions such as making the opening day roster. Congrats Joe! |
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Over - Phrozen |
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Under - Missing Jamie Moyer, TwistyWristy, Wet Luzinski |
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Never - Borg_Queen, Carnac the Magnificent, FanSince1993, Joecatz, kmrblue1027, philsandthrills, Rujasu, veni Vidi Vinci |
| Event #12 - Player other than Joe Blanton or Jim Thome in the "best shape of his life." |
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Date - March 23.5 |
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Result - Never |
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| Still infuriated. |
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Over - |
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Under - Borg_Queen, Carnac the Magnificent, FanSince1993, Joecatz, kmrblue1027, Missing Jamie Moyer, philsandthrills, Phrozen, Rujasu, TwistyWristy, veni Vidi Vinci, Wet Luzinski |
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Never - |
| Event #13 - Coal Hammels signs contract extension (bonus points for predicting the dollars and the years). |
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Date - March 24 |
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Result - Never |
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| The Event happenings go here |
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Over - Borg_Queen, Carnac the Magnificent, Joecatz, Missing Jamie Moyer |
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Under - Phrozen |
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Never - FanSince1993, kmrblue1027, philsandthrills, Rujasu, TwistyWristy, veni Vidi Vinci, Wet Luzinski |
| Event #14 - Dontrelle Willis appears at first base. |
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Date - March 26.5 |
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Result - Never |
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| D-Train isn't even allowed to appear in the dugout let alone first base as he was released March 16th. |
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Over - |
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Under - Carnac the Magnificent, kmrblue1027 |
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Never - Borg_Queen, FanSince1993, Joecatz, Missing Jamie Moyer, philsandthrills, Phrozen, Rujasu, TwistyWristy, veni Vidi Vinci, Wet Luzinski |
| Event #15 - Announcement of Opening Day first baseman. |
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Date - April 1.5 |
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Result - Never |
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Over - Borg_Queen, FanSince1993, Joecatz, Phrozen, TwistyWristy, veni Vidi Vinci, Wet Luzinski |
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Under - Carnac the Magnificent, kmrblue1027, Missing Jamie Moyer, philsandthrills, Rujasu |
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Never - |
Roster Move Events
| Jiwan James |
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Result - Sent Down Early |
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Sent Down Early - Borg_Queen, Joecatz, kmrblue1027, Missing Jamie Moyer, philsandthrills, Rujasu, TwistyWristy, veni Vidi Vinci, Wet Luzinski |
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Extended Spring Training - Carnac the Magnificent, FanSince1993, Phrozen |
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Opening Day Roster - |
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On Deck Series - |
| Phillipe Aumont |
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Result - Sent Down Early |
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Sent Down Early - FanSince1993, Rujasu, veni Vidi Vinci |
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Extended Spring Training - kmrblue1027, Missing Jamie Moyer, TwistyWristy |
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Opening Day Roster - Carnac the Magnificent |
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On Deck Series - Borg_Queen, Joecatz, philsandthrills, Phrozen, Wet Luzinski |
| Justin De Fratus |
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Result - Injured |
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Sent Down Early - Rujasu, TwistyWristy |
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Extended Spring Training - Carnac the Magnificent, Joecatz, kmrblue1027, Wet Luzinski |
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Opening Day Roster - veni Vidi Vinci |
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On Deck Series - FanSince1993, Missing Jamie Moyer, philsandthrills, Phrozen |
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Injured - Borg_Queen |
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Domonic Brown - |
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Result - Sent Down Early |
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Sent Down Early - |
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Extended Spring Training - philsandthrills, Phrozen |
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Opening Day Roster - FanSince1993, Joecatz, kmrblue1027, Missing Jamie Moyer, veni Vidi Vinci |
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On Deck Series - Borg_Queen, Carnac the Magnificent, Rujasu, TwistyWristy, Wet Luzinski |
| Scott Podsednik - |
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Result - On Deck Series |
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| Much to Scott Podsednik's consternation but even more so to LeepinLizardz's, Juan Pierre won out over Pods for a spot on the roster. |
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Sent Down Early - Rujasu, Wet Luzinski |
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Extended Spring Training - Carnac the Magnificent, philsandthrills |
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Opening Day Roster - Borg_Queen, Phrozen, veni Vidi Vinci |
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"Bye"/Released - Joecatz, kmrblue1027 |
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On Deck Series - FanSince1993, Missing Jamie Moyer, TwistyWristy |
| Michael Schwimmer - |
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Result - Sent Down Early |
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Sent Down Early - Borg_Queen, Joecatz, veni Vidi Vinci |
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Extended Spring Training - Missing Jamie Moyer |
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Opening Day Roster - Carnac the Magnificent, FanSince1993, Phrozen, TwistyWristy |
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On Deck Series - kmrblue1027, philsandthrills, Rujasu, Wet Luzinski |
The Results
| Nostradamus Wannabe | Total Correct | Total Incorrect |
| FanSince1993 |
10 |
11 |
| Rujasu |
9 |
12 |
| Joecatz |
8 |
13 |
| philsandthrills |
8 |
13 |
| veni vidi vici |
7 |
14 |
| Borg_Queen |
7 |
14 |
| TwistyWristy |
7 |
14 |
| Missing Jamie Moyer |
7 |
14 |
| Phrozen |
7 |
14 |
| Wet Luzinski |
5 |
16 |
| krmblue1027 |
5 |
16 |
| Carnac the Magnificent |
3 |
18 |
Congratulations FanSince1993! As winner of the 2012 Spring Training O/U/N with 10 correct picks, as a prize, you will receive a champion slinky*.
*Slinky was obtained by TGP in the 3rd grade in a three-way, blockbuster trade swap involving four(!) sticks of gum, a Yo-Yo and a frog. Many lamented the trade at the time, as Slinky was injured with a right helical contusion and looked kinkier than Pat The Bat. After being nursed back to health however, Slinky went on to have a hall of fame career, winning an astounding 478 out of 510 staircases, most notably, the Philadelphia Museum of Art and the Penrose stairs. Slinky retired as a 12 time All-Stair. Slinky was coached by Matt Stairs.
Please contact TwistyWristy (email in profile) to finalize the deal, as negotiations with Minor League affiliate the Amazon Armadillos is almost complete. If you have any children, the Amazon Aardvarks will be happy to transfer over additional Slinky prospects with lots of raw talent and upside.
Thanks for playing everyone and be sure to submit your entries for the 2012 Over/Under/Never Regular Seasons events!
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