Look, I'm blaming no one but Mr. Cohen for this one. You poke BaseBa'al in the eye like that, he's gonna take a large, Hooters-waitress-knocking-up-rednecked shaped dump on your cap. Chipper Jones ended a wild, nauseating contest with a two-run walk off home run in the bottom of the 11th, as the Braves overcame deficits of six and four runs to take the second game of this mid-week series.
And the six run lead was coughed up by Mr. Roy Halladay himself.
Things started well enough, with the Phillies plating four runs in the top of the third, with a bases loaded three run double by Laynce Nix as the big blow. Halladay was cruising. Things were lookin' sweet, kids. Adding two more runs in the fifth, and a 6-0 lead looked insurmountable.
Then the bad thing happened. A series of dinks and dunks off Halladay, who was strugging to miss bats and appeared to be a sweaty mess, brought home two runs and loaded the bases for Brian McCann, who did what McCann always f&*$ing does against the Phillies -- grand slam, tie game! The Braves would score two more in the sixth to take an 8-6 lead, heading into the teeth of the Braves vaunted bullpen.
Nuh uh. Ty Wigginton walked and John Mayberry singled to lead off the seventh of Eric O'Flaherty and, just like last night off Jonny Venters, the Phillies stung O'Flaherty, with Carlos Ruiz slamming a three-run homer to take a 9-8 lead. The Phillies would add on in the top of the eighth, again thanks to a bases loaded double from Ruiz, and held a 12-8 lead.
The bottom of the eighth was just one of "those innings." Jose Contreras issued a leadoff walk to Dan Uggla, and then induced what could have been a double play grounder up the middle from Chipper Jones. But Jimmy Rollins muffed the play, everyone was save, and the Braves proceeded to plate five runs off the ineffective Contreras and Michael Schwimer.
Then came the unstoppable Craig Kimbrel, who issued a leadoff walk to Juan Pierre, who stole second, and "struck" Jimmy Rollins "out" on a called strike three curve that was at least eight inches off the plate. Pierre advanced to third on a Placido Polanco groundout, and scored on a Shane Victorino infield single to tie the game at 13-13.
Where was Jonathan Papelbon? The closer, along with set-up man Chad Qualls, had pitched three of the last four days and was either unavailable due to overuse (reasonable), or being held back for a possible save situation (very dumb). So newly promoted Brian Sanches got the call, and he did an okay job until that gut-punch homer from Jones in the 11th.
So what's the big story? It has to be Halladay's flop. LIke I said, he looked sweaty and ill, like that game in Chicago last season, but given his less-than-Halladayish peripherals this year, there's probably reason for mild concern.
And the story that will be flushed away, unfortunately, is Chooch's three hits and seven RBIs. Attaguy. And the Phillies hitters actually having a clue, taking a cue from the Braves' patient and pretty effective approach to Cole Hamels on Tuesday night.
The most mind-f&*%ing game graph of all time after the jump.