FanPost

Raul Valdes Pulls Down Cardinals' Pants And Laughs At Them: Phillies 5, Cardinals 3 (10 Innings)

(Our mighty and benevolent bloglord WholeCamels has introduced a contest on Twitter to write a recap in the FanPosts section where the winner gets frontpage'd. This is my feeble attempt.) EDITOR'S NOTE: Good enough for me! Thank you, and enjoy! - WholeCamels

May 25, 2011.

Most remember this day as the day Oprah Winfrey bid farewell to The Oprah Winfrey Show. It was, after all, a monumental occasion in talk show television history. However, there are a few out there who remember this day for something else. These loud-mouth, classless scumbags think not of Oprah Winfrey when they think of May 25, 2011. No. Instead, they think of a man. A myth. A legend. They think of Wilson Valdez. They think of Wilson Valdez's finest hour when he came on to pitch in the 19th inning after playing 18 innings at second base while going 3 for 6 at the plate. These people, Philadelphia Phillies fans, think of greatness.

May 25, 2012

It is precisely 366 days later. Once again a man named Valdezs finds himself on the mound pitching the 19th inning. The opponent is different, but after a rough start that includes a single, a sacrifice and a walk, Raul Valdes stands on the mound and looked into Tyler Greene's eyes with a look that can only be described as "I Am Valdes Hear Me Roar". Strike 3. Matt Holliday now walks up to the guillotine, quivering with a very rightful fright. He knows the inevitable outcome. Try as he might to make contact, Matt Holliday can only swing aimlessly at strike three. The mightiest of gods had been reduced to the merest of mortals. Extra innings we would go again on May 25. Again, thine hero's name is Valdes.

There are other details from this game. Details such as Jimmy Rollins singling home Placido Polanco, Cliff Lee's slump continuing, Carlos Ruiz blocking the plate like a MAN, Hunter Pence hitting a game-winning 2-run home run in the 10th inning, and Jonathan Papelbon picking up a save. But all these details are insignificant when compared to the accomplishments of the great Valdes.

On most days, the Valdezs is a nothing. A nobody. A replacement level waste of space. But on May 25, he transforms himself into something larger than life. And for this, I, your humble guest-recapper, can only bow down in awe.

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