The Century Man - Phillies 12, Reds 1

Eat your heart out, Curt. - Rich Schultz

Cole Hamels reached his long-sought 100-win milestone as the Phillies absolutely demolished the Cincinnati Reds by a 12-1 margin.

After a lackluster start in his first three starts of the season, and a strong outing in his fourth start was ruined by the Phillies' Bullpen of Ineptitude; Hamels was still seeking his 100th win.

After an awkward first inning in which the Reds got an early run on two hits and a walk Hamels settled in strong, striking out ten over the next six innings, scattering one more hit and walk and keeping Cincinnati off the board. In the third, Hamels posted the second immaculate inning of the year, striking out Zack Cozart, Brandon Philips and Todd Frazier on nine pitches.

MLB does not have a highlight video of that inning because they hate fun. Incidentally, there are zero embeddable videos from this game. What the fuck.

The Phillies would ensure the win for Cole by doing something they haven't been doing much of lately: scoring a shitload of runs, with two big innings. Among the position players, on Howard was kept hitless, though he walked and scored twice. The offensive stars for the game, though, have to be Cody Asche and Domonic Brown. In five at-bats, Brown had two extra-base hits, including a two-run upper-deck homerun to right and a three-run double, tieing his career high with five RBIs. Asche also had two hits, with a two run-double and an RBI single. Asche is now hitting .294 in his last ten games.

But everyone contributed tonight. Chase Utley had a single and walk. Carlos Ruiz had two hits. Cesar Hernandez capped the scoring with his first big league homerun in an eighth inning pinch-hit. Marlon Byrd had two hits, including a double. Even Tony Gwynn Jr. had a hit and a walk.

With Hamels' win well secured, the Phillies went to the Choose Your Own Adventure Bullpen, and, thankfully, chose a boring path. Jake Diekman pitched a perfect eighth, and Jonathan Papelbon, who was apparently no longer sore after having rested for six hundred years, pitched a scoreless ninth around a garbagetime walk.

Fangraph of 2007:

Source: FanGraphs

The win improves the Phils' record to 18-22, and snaps a dreadful beingshitty streak at Citizens' Bank Park. The Reds look for a rematch tomorrow, sending Tony CIngrani to the mound against Cliff Lee. That game should be a blast.

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