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Monday Grapefruit Links

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Phillies ink Miguel Cairo; Earth inexplicably remains on its axis.

Kyle Kendrick wants back in the rotation.

The Fightins gets upclose and personal with Cole Hamels.  And by "upclose and personal" I mean they've posted several spring workout buffalo shots of Mr. Hamels.  Ladies and certain dudes, take note.

The Shibe Times chides Chase Utley to take his time coming back from surgery.

Todd Zolecki > Alyssa Milano.  I doubt Todd has banged as many doughy pitchers, though.  Advantage: Samantha.

Krod: Rubber, glue, etc.

Phillies more likely to return to World Series than Rays.  Not exactly a tough guess; the Phillies don't have to get through Boston and a revamped Yankees team just to make the postseason.

New catcher Ronny Paulino has put all that bad stuff behind him.  Seriously.  Hope springs eternal...

The Tampa Bay Rays give Pat Burrell's English Bulldog, Elvis, his own locker in Port Charlotte, complete with nameplate and his number - 5 1/2.  Is it dusty in here...?