clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

The Awkward Bethesda Bar Mitzvah: Phillies @ Nationals Game Thread, April 14, 2011

New, 645 comments

Cliff Lee gives it another go-'round tonight, hoping for better results than his last dud against the Braves. For the Nationals it's righty Jordan Zimmermann.

If all goes well, Cliff Lee will face Jayson Werth tonight. Should be weird. Think of it this way: you have a brief but passionate affair with a beautiful, perfect-in-every-way woman. Still, you are committed to your current wife (also quite beautiful and perfect in her own way) so you break things off with your mistress. But then, your wife leaves you for some rich inside-the-beltway jerk who lives in Bethesda, Maryland and drives a Porsche. Having tried to deny your feelings for your one time fling for a year, you decide to propose to her. She accepts. Things are going great for the first few months, then you and your ex-wife's son's Bar Mitzvah creeps along and your ex-wife has booked a Synagogue near her and her new rich jerk husband's house for the ceremony. Of course you have to go; your son is becoming a man! And of course you can't leave your new wife at home; she's your wife and you love her! So you make the trip down to the DMV area, fully expecting some kind of tense, awkward interaction between your old wife and your new wife at the party in front of the lox and bagels spread.

(Note: I have never been married or had a mistress, so it may be nothing like this at all.)

Discuss the Bar Mitzvah here.


Current Series

3 game series vs Nationals @ Nationals Park

Tue 04/12 WP: Livan Hernandez (1 - 1)
SV: Sean Burnett
LP: Joe Blanton (0 - 1)
4 - 7 loss
Wed 04/13 WP: Roy Halladay (2 - 0)
LP: John Lannan (1 - 1)
3 - 2 win

Philadelphia Phillies
@ Washington Nationals

Thursday, Apr 14, 2011, 7:05 PM EDT
Nationals Park

Cliff Lee vs Jordan Zimmermann

Mostly sunny. Winds blowing from left to right field at 5-15 m.p.h. Game time temperature around 65.

Complete Coverage >



New Wife

#33 / Pitcher / Philadelphia Phillies

6-3

190

L

L

Aug 30, 1978



Old Wife

#28 / Right Field / Washington Nationals

6-5

220

R

R

May 20, 1979