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Some Tuesday Phillies Links for You, June 21, 2011: Jack is Back, Al is Out, and Don't Mess with Mike Stutes

The Phillies

Rosenthal: Pujols out 4 to 6 weeks with 'small fracture in wrist' - Viva El Birdos
Don't worry. Lance Berkman can't possibly hurt the Phillies. Stutes Twitter Explosion Results in Consequences for Mathieson
Favorite lesson: Don't mess with Mike Stutes.

Tony Verduci - Johnny Sits Down To Watch DNL - TwitVid
Slow clap. Prolly NSFW. Volume down at least.

Phillies general manager Amaro facing big test in months ahead | Philadelphia Daily News | 06/21/2011
Imma be honstwitchoo: The "losing record against winning teams" does irk.

Lack of offense on road is still a big concern | Courier-Post |
West coast games are the snooziest.

Divorce McCourt

Dodgers: Selig rejects Dodgers TV contract, nullifying McCourt divorce deal -
I'll laugh when Selig somehow winds up using this crisis as his get-out-of-Wisconsin-for-a-lotta-lotta money card.

Frank McCourt Must Go (UPDATED) | It's About The Money
More details and commentary for the eleventy bajillion lawyers who read this site. As one commenter noted, for all his faults, surely Mark Cuban's not that bad.

Writer's Workshop

Baseball Prospectus | Changing Speeds: The Found Poetry of Player Comments
Of note, Fanboys! -  "His Befuddler's Three"

On Narratives. | pitchers & poets

A team’s narrative isn’t meant to be a trifling, six-month one-act play. It’s a Michenerian epic, spanning years and generations.


Computer Numbers!

The Baseball Analysts: Categorizing Pitchers by Batted Ball Types and Strikeout Rates
h/t RememberThePhitans. More fun with quadrants!

Nemeses and Yutes, after the jumpity jump!


Jack is back: McKeon tapped to lead the Florida Marlins once again - Florida Marlins -
Looking at the comments, there appears to be a Wellbutrin shortage in Miami. Eleventy losses in a row does that.

Angels Win 2-1 In Rainy, Fan-less Miami - Halos Heaven
Marlins tie the franchise record.

Hudson Dominant In Braves Shutout Win Over Jays - Talking Chop
1,600 career strikeouts and a game-winning HR in the 7th. Impressive.

Servin' Up Yutes

Box Score Recap, 20 June 2011 | Phuture Phillies
Welcome, Gulf Coast League Savants! Yesterday's Roundup, bottom-lined and bullet-pointed for you, you self-grandiose, ADHD-addled boss:

  • I hereby nominate Matt Rizzotti to play the part of Keith Moreland in the 1980 year-in-review video remake this year.
  • The unsinkable Drew Carpenter is unsinkable.
  • Travis d'Arnaud would look good back in the system right about now. But hey, Galvis is hitting .270!
  • Yo ho, Brian Schneider!
  • Aaron Altherr: Keep hittin' 'em where they ain't, kiddo!