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$35 Million Dollar Men - Phillies' B-Team Rolls Up DoorMets 9 - 4

A giant among men.
A giant among men.

By my rough calculations, it looks like it cost about $35,000,000.00 to field the team that beat in the brains of a Mets team that is rapidly losing interest in this, the 2011 MLB season.  And of that $35,000,000.00, nearly two-thirds of it ($22,000,000.00) was wrapped up in Shane Victorino and Chase Utley.  Two of the cheapest dates tonight were starting pitcher Vance Worley and the versatile John Mayberry, playing first base tonight in place of a dinged Ryan Howard.  Combined, the two get less money than Cliff Lee has in his wallet right now, but both showed why it is so important to look for contributors that don't cost $20,000,000.00+ per year.

With that windy wind-up out of the way (and a h/t to Nastyem in the gamethread for the "DoorMets" moniker), there was, you know, a game played tonight. And there was an earthquake and stuff, but that was just John Mayberry hitting another bomb.

Things certainly didn't start off well, though...

In the first inning, Vance Worley gave all of us more heartburn than the earthquake.  He took 30 pitches to dispose of the METS, for crying out loud.  I was ready to march on CBP with a pitchfork in one hand and a torch in the other, but I settled down when I realized that he was just toying with them.  The Mets started things off with two singles by Pagan and Tejada.  With runners at first and third and no outs, usually you can figure on the batting team scoring 1.8 runs, right? Except that the run expectancy matrix applies to Major League Baseball teams, and this was the Mets.  So of course, David Wright hits a pretty hard shot to Polanco which probably would have been an infield hit, but Pagan had run on contact and was thrown out easily at the plate.  Then Lucas Duda struck out. Worley walked Jason Bay but then punched out Nick Evans looking.  LOL. Mets.

Then there was boring stuff for a while until the Phillies came up in the third inning.  It started when Victorino Look! A bird! hit a solo home run.  John Mayberry came up after Polanco reached on a single and Utley was hit by a pitch for the 4,192nd time in his career.  Yet another XBH from John John, this time a three run homer.  It's kind of getting old, Mayberry.  Can't you hit singles, too?  Oh, did that too...

I would say the Mets were doing more boring things while this was going on, but that's not true.  In fact, they were going down one after the other in interesting and entertaining ways, kind of like the old Lemmings game.  Fifteen in a row at one point.  Worley, after the playful, 30 pitch first inning, mowed the Mets down like Australians at Gallipoli.  Worley's final line was: 7 IP, 1 R, 9 K, 1 BB, and 5 H on 109 pitches.  And he charmed two balls into the outfield with his bat and dimples, driving in one run with his two hits.

The Phillies' bats had another big inning in the fifth.  Four Phillies reached with hits, and the big blow was a two run triple by Victorino just over the head of Pagan in center.  When the dust cleared on that, the game was in the bag.  Michael Stutes made things mildly interesting at the end, regressing in a low-leverage spot, surrendering 3 runs in garbage time.  But that was just the Phillies playing prevent defense and running the ball up the gut every offensive series from the sixth inning on.

Fangraph of DEVASTATION!