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A Series of Unfortunate Events - Phillies fall to Cardinals, 8-3

Swung on and belted, deep to the edge of the grass, that'll bring home a run.  (Photo by Dilip Vishwanat/Getty Images)
Swung on and belted, deep to the edge of the grass, that'll bring home a run. (Photo by Dilip Vishwanat/Getty Images)
Getty Images

Roy Halladay pitched two innings, allowing four runs on a grand slam by Yadier Molina; and the Phillies were never able to... wait, what? Two innings? Yes. Halladay removed after two, pinch-hit for by Pete Orr, suffering shoulder soreness. The Phillies emphasized that this was precautionary, but even so, "shoulder" and "soreness" are two words that should never be used in a sentence together when describing pitchers.

More after the jump.

In the third, Mike Fontenot led off with a single, Orr bunted him over (YAY small ball!); Jimmy Rollins grounded out moving Fontenot to third, and Juan "Clutch" Pierre came through with an RBI single to right.

The Cardinals, though, tacked on more runs in the fifth, as Carlos Beltran took Chad Qualls deep with a three-run homerun. Really, who saw that coming. In the sixth, Mike Adams also took Chad Qualls deep. Astonishing. Qualls' seven homeruns allowed is the most in the majors for a reliever. Fantastic.

In the eighth and ninth, the Phils scrounged two garbage-time runs, on a force-out grounder by Shane Victorino and another RBI single from Pierre. Jose Contreras continued to pitch well, with a scoreless seventh inning, and Raul Valdes pitched a scoreless eighth. Joe Savery appeared to be pitching well, and even recorded his first career at-bat.

In the silver linings department, the Phillies won the series from the Cardinals, on the road, capturing a semblance of revenge for last year's NLDS. Putting aside the circumstances of today's loss, wining three of four in St. Louis has to be looked at as a great series.

The real story, though, is Halladay. As of press time this afternoon, no new information is available. He was removed as a precaution suffering shoulder soreness; he will be reevaluated Tuesday, may not make his next start. It appears this is something that's been ongoing for a few starts, according to Rich Dubee. Way to go Dubes. This isn't good. It could be merely unfortunate, or it could be a disaster.

Fangraph of beshittedness:

Source: FanGraphs

The Phillies drop to 25-24, one game over .500, currently 4.5 out of first. Tomorrow, they play the first game of a three-game set against the Mets in New York.

Happy Memorial Day weekend, everybody.