Hate Night in the Love/Hate Relationship: Marlins 5, Phillies 1

In the 1970's, Gilles Deleuze and Felix Guattari proposed that modern psychiatry, particularly modern psychoanalysis, had really screwed things up. Far from the reactionary moral position that usually follows that particular proposal -- "I mean, sleeping with my mother?! Come on, now." -- Deleuze and Guattari were convinced that psychoanalysis itself was too conservative, invested as it was with traditional notions of mental health, familial stability, and normative sexuality. Instead, they suggested, the way we need to think about humanity is as a "Body Without Organs" -- a set of non-specific connections that can shift, change, and mutate at will. Basically, they wanted to promote a "schizoanalysis," a vision of mental health that valorized the non-rigid. Instead of having a map of the psyche, as Freud may have wanted, Deleuze and Guattari just destroyed the map entirely.

Now, if we take schizoanalysis seriously, then the outcome of this game is really much more about, like, playing with the idea of competition as a terminus, or about reimagining the definition of "positive outcomes," or about how the drive to win is more connected to the sex drive than the ambition drive, or something. And in that way, as a point of departure for schizoanalysis, this game was a total success!

In any other way, this game was just a practice in making us crazy. In brief: Cole Hamels pitched a hell of a game, going six innings, striking out ten, walking none, and giving up two runs on seven hits. His opposite number, Alex Sanabia was just a bit more brilliant -- oh, no, wait, that's not right at all: he went six and a third, but struck out only three, walked one, but only gave up one run on seven hits. That one run was a blast from Our Favorite Martian, Domonic Brown. Sadly, Brown's heroics weren't enough, especially after the eighth inning reared its ugly head. Three runs, two pitchers, tons of awful bloops: use your imagination and color in what you know to be true. Then, as if by fate itself, Chad Qualls came in and pitched a silent ninth inning against the Phillies, striking out two (h/t Prof. Cohen). The Aristocrats!

So here are the things you missed if you didn't watch the game: Dom Brown's home run; Cole Hamels' ten strikeouts; a painfully awful blown caught stealing call against Chase Utley; and Marcell Ozuna's hilarious adventures in fielding.

And now, to act as a blog without organs, here are some scattered thoughts from the masthead:

David Cohen: "PHILLIES SUCK CAN'T BEAT AAAA TEAM WITH ACE ON MOUND"

JoeCatz: helped, by way of typo, to coin the nickname Jose "The Nose" Fernandez. Also, pointed out quite rightly that Hamels should have been the victorious pitcher tonight with that line against this team.

WetLuzinski wants you to remember.

RememberthePhitans notes that, with regard to our title, these nights make the sex better. So there's that.

Some rejected titles: "Momentum is a Lie" (Prof); "THANK GOD I GOT STUCK AT WORK AND DIDN'T DRIVE TWO HOURS FOR THAT" (Joe); "Anatomy of a Train Wreck" (RTP).

So, do we feel zen? Do we feel deterritorialized? Are our bodies and minds bereft of the conventional need to align wins with pleasure? No? Me neither. And hey, Ruiz is going to the DL, out 3-4 weeks, and Howard got a cortisone injection in his knee. Let's get crazy!

Fangraph of WTF below:

<iframe src="http://www.fangraphs.com/graphframe.aspx?config=0&static=555169&type=livewins&num=0&h=450&w=450&date=2013-05-20&team=Marlins&dh=0" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" height="450" width = "450" style="border:1px solid black;"></iframe><br /><span style="font-size:9pt;">Source: <a href="http://www.fangraphs.com/livewins.aspx?date=2013-05-20&team=Marlins&dh=0&season=2013">FanGraphs</a></span>