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Substitutions are a necessary evil in cooking and baking. For my sauerbraten sauce (excellent on sliced steak and pork loin!) I rarely have beef stock available, so I use beef broth and the result is pretty good. Grains of paradise is a hard spice to find, so I use a mixture of black pepper, nutmeg, and cardamom for my Thanksgiving apple pie.
When you run out of Dom Brown, though, there is no adequate substitute. There is no combination of Laynce Nix, Michael Martinez, and John Mayberry that equal him. Even if you grind them up and shape them into a new baseball player. Actually, especially if you do that. Don't do that.
John Lannan and Jake Westbrook are our pitchers tonight. I will try not to spend the evening yelling "WHY AREN'T YOU DOM BROWN?! GIVE ME BACK MY DOM BROWN!" at every player I see on screen. I'll try, but I make no promises.
Discuss the game in the comments below.