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Charlie Manuel getting coaching offers; throwing them back in offerers' faces

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The ex-Phillies manager is apparently being pursued for his abilities as a hitting coach and really couldn't care less.

"Hey, pal. Hey. F*** you."
"Hey, pal. Hey. F*** you."
Jeff Curry-USA TODAY Sports

Picture what you think a retired Charlie Manuel is getting up to. What's he doing? Headin' down to the old fishin' hole? But instead of a fishin' pole, he's taking a baseball bat? And that warm afternoon, as the cicadas belch, he  destroys the silent forest oasis by bringing down lustful killing strokes on the water's surface, returning home with a bucketful of bashed-to-death lake trout?

Man that's weird as hell. What he's actually doing is playing humanity's answer to cats licking themselves.

Yes, he's happy, somehow, without legions of crazed strangers screaming baseball advice to him on social media. But that doesn't mean teams aren't actively trying to seduce him away from the golf course and JSals.

All we know for sure, or because someone with a verified Twitter account said it, is that it was the Orioles who tried to lure Manuel into being a hitting coach. The other AL East teams mentioned could be anyone. I'm sure the teams that want to get Charlie Manuel to touch all their bats isn't limited to a single division.

But Charlie isn't interested, at least for now. It'll take more than a phone call to get the secrets to Charlie Manuel's Magic Offense. Apparently.