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The Good Phight Power Rankings Episode IX: Cody Asche Puns

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In which we examine some of the many possible japes and puns that take advantage of a particular third baseman's eminently punnable name.

Smasche the laws of physics!
Smasche the laws of physics!
Mitchell Leff

Because Punnable is totally a word. Cody Asche's name, of course, containing the syllable "ash," which can of course be manipulated by Grammar Scientists to be more funner. Or less funner, depending on your tolerance for bad puns!

1. Masche'd Potatoes - Could be easily used in case he Masches a dinger.

2. Swaschebuckled - Beating the Pirates!

2. Basche Brother - Would be better if Asche's brother also played baseball.

3. Crasche Davis - If he ever becomes a minor league catcher.

4. George Wascheington - His dingers could cross the Delaware.

5. Jobs Casche Hope - Ten years ago...

6. Hoban Wascheburn - He's a leaf on the wind.

7. Trasche Can - 0 for 5, 3Ks, 2 GIDPs, 3 Errors, TOOTBLAN

8. Daschecam - Went to Russia and saw a meteor.

9. Mt. Raschemore - He'll be up there with Mike Aschemidt and Maikel Fraschenco someday.

10. Corned Beef Hasche - He'd be an All-Star in the Irish Leagues.

11. Flasche Photography - A walkoff under the lights sets the flashbulbs poppin'!

12. Coal Asche - Millions of years from now, future societies will use Asche memoriabilia for fuel. But not Hammels the trader to are troops.

13. Benghasche - Thanks Obama.

14. Plascheido Polanco - At least he's not Pedro Fascheliz!

15. Emerald Asche Borer - Not only is he singlehandedly destroying an entire species of tree, he's also boring.

What other Cody Asche puns can you think of?

Be sure to tune in next week* for another exciting episode of Good Phight Power Rankings, where we'll discuss WWII aircraft carriers or polymeric asphalt products!

*Note, week refers to a Metric Week, which is defined as 100 centiWeeks, each of which is approximately who knows how long.

Previously, on The Good Phight Power Rankings:

I. WPHT Radio Commercials

II. Architecture

III. Weather

IV: One Sided Games

V: Phillies All-Star Pitchers

VI: Phillies All-Star Hitters

VII: Roy Halladay's Twitter Feed

VIII: Runs Batted In