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In honor of St. Patrick's Day, which, thanks to the power of Time Zones, it still is, as of this writing, I present the Phillies' franchise All-Irish team.
Presenting the #Phillies All-Irish Name Team! #StPatricksDay pic.twitter.com/JMyGEqeK73
— Phillies (@Phillies) March 17, 2015
I mean, we can do better than this, right? The people want details!
First Base: 'Dirty Jack' Doyle - born in Killorgin, Ireland.
Well, there you have it. The only Irishman to ever play for the Phillies and the sole member of the franchise's All-Ireland team.
Editor's note: You said All-Irish, Phrozen. And you call yourself Irish, and you were born in Seattle, so get your shit together.
Ok, fine. So, as they say, Ireland's greatest export is people. And, alas, Sir Robert McAlpine was not a Phillie, but plenty ended up in our red pinstripes nonetheless.
Catcher: Bill Killefer - Dubbed 'Reindeer Bill,' apparently for his ability to throw out would-be stealers, Killefer was one of the players who jumped to the Federal League. Regretting this, he sought to back out of his contract, ended up in court, and was described by the judge as "a baseball player of unique, exceptional and extraordinary skill and experience. Unfortunately the record also shows that he is a person upon whose pledged word little or no reliance can be placed..."
Second Base: Danny Murtaugh - His biography was called The Whistling Irishman. If that's not the Irishest thing, then nothing is.
Third Base: Cody Asche - But he isn't Irish, Phrozen! No, seriously, check out this authoitative website where it suggests his nickname is Corned Beef Hasche. No, Phrozen, that pun was stupid.
Shortstop: Mickey Doolin - Doolin (or Doolin), who changed his name from Doolittle, presumably in hopes of dooing more, is notably mostly for not having been a championship horse jockey. He was one of the best shortstops in baseball during the early teens.
Left Field: 'Irish' Meusel - While named for his Irishness, Meusel was actually German.
Center Field: Sherry Magee - One of the finest defensive outfielders of the early 20th Century, Magee was described as having the "the Irish traits of quick wittedness, a hot temper and an aggressive love of fighting," by JJ Ward.
Right Field: Ed Delahanty - Renowned as a heavy drinker, Delahanty was reportedly thrown off a train in New York for having threatened a passenger who he believed had stolen his whiskey.
Pitcher: Hugh Mulcahy - One of the all-time hard luck players, Mulcahy was the twice-20 game losing "ace" of a team that, over four consecutive seasons (1937-1940), managed to lose 406 games, before being the first Major League player drafted into World War Two. His first enlistment expired on December 5, 1941. Two days later...
Manager: Cornelius McGillicuddy - Okay, humor me. Connie Mack wasn't a Phillie anything, but he was a Philadelphia manager for longer than anyone has ever managed anything. The Irish are known for their tenacity as much as anything, and if spending more than sixty years in Philadelphia sports doesn't require tenacity, nothing does. Plus, as the New York Times observed, Mack was "best remembered for his sensational scrapping of championship machines."
Biographical details are quoted from the SABR Biography Project, Wikipedia and the Phillies Encyclopedia