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So this is usually where I put the preamble, but what is there that we really need to know outside of the two pitchers going today? The Rockies are a bad team that proved last night that they're still better than the Phillies. The Phillies were almost no hit by a guy named Chad, which would probably be the first time that ever happened because "Chad." And now the Phillies are the worst team in their division, and the third worst team in baseball. So they have that going for them!
Let's just get into this.
Eddie Butler -- Sometimes when I hear Eddie Butler's name, I think of Eddie from The Munsters if he grew up to be a butler. And then I start thinking, wow, I wonder if that's what he wanted to do, or if Herman Munster's bumbling and Lily Munster's lack of cogent parenting left him without a lot of options. Then I wonder if he really could've made it out of the Munster home unscathed, given the odd bloodlines of vampire and Frankenstein that produced his werewolf self, along with his weirdly hot sister. Then I'm sure he's gone into butlering just to give some semblance of order to his life, even though it's likely that it won't work, and they'll find him wearing his employers' skin like a suit, a silver bullet to the head self-inflicted. Damn, Eddie...you never stood a chance.
And then I remember that Eddie Butler isn't a name and an occupation, but the name of a pitcher with a low 4 ERA who pitches for the Colorado Rockies, and I realize my Munsters fandom is getting too deep.
Aaron Harang -- ESPN tells me that Aaron Harang has been really good in Citizen's Bank Park, going 2-1 with a .61 ERA in four home starts. That's fantastic information and all, but I'm pretty sure that just means that we're going to watch a brilliant game with a couple mistakes that turns into a hard luck loss. A game that, uh, is a bit familiar. In any case, Harang's probably cheap in FanDuel, and I didn't steer you wrong with Bettis yesterday, so why not?