Game 61 Open Thread: Phillies at Reds

Brace yourselves, readers. The Phillies are just nine innings away from being swept by the Reds and cementing the worst record in baseball for at least another day.

Nine men stand in the way of that outcome. Here are their names.

So the Phillies are almost definitely getting swept. Cody Asche, Freddy Galvis, and Carlos Ruiz are riding the pine for today's day game in favor of Jeff Francoeur, Cesar Hernandez, and Cameron Rupp. Chase Utley and Ryan Howard are in the lineup, but they're split by none other than MAIKEL FRANCO, batting clean-up. Even the monstrous stupidity of Ryne Sandberg couldn't stand to bat Franco lower in the order anymore. Even he recognized that MAIKEL FRANCO needs to be higher in the batting order. On normal teams, that would mean that his bat would make a greater impact. On this team, he's surrounded by Utley and Howard, so his bat will be the most active thing going. YES I SAID IT.

Jerome Williams is taking the mound for the Phillies today, so the offense has their work cut out for them. Unless a miracle happens and Williams remembers what he was doing in 2014 that made him so successful, they're going to have ground to make up right away.

I don't mean to be so negative. But last night's game was comically bad, as was the game before that. I don't think anything but negativity is warranted here. But just in case I'm wrong...

PANDAS ON A SLIDE! Negativity defeated!

Discuss the game in the comments below.