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They're Still Shitty: D-Bax 13, Phils 1

A bad Phillies team was trounced by the Diamondbacks tonight, losing the game with an eleven run second inning.

This is such a sad picture.
This is such a sad picture.
Joe Camporeale-USA TODAY Sports

There's not much to say about this one, and I'm not going to try. I mean, some idiot thought it was worth writing happy thoughts a couple nights ago, and now they lose two in a row by a combined score of 26-4.

David Buchanan was terrible. 11 runs in 1.2 innings pitched, and a Game Score of -12. This, incidentally, is the second worst Game Score ever recorded by a Phillies, second to some Prohibition-era dude who pitched a complete game. It doesn't really matter who you're playing against, if you throw as much weaksauce as Buke did tonight, you're gonna get slammed.

Still, it's kind of an impressive rundown:

Yasmany Tomas singled. Jarrod Saltalamacchia walked. Aaron Hill singled. Chris Owings hit a ground-rule double, two runs. Jeremy Hellickson singled, four runs. AJ Pollock singled. Jake Lamb lined out. Paul Goldschmidt walked. David Peralta hit a grand slam, eight runs. Tomas doubled. Saltalamacchia flied out (2 outs). Hill homered, ten runs. Owings doubled. Hellickson singled, eleven runs.

Buke was replaced by Hector Neris, who induced a quick third out; but in the space of two-thirds of an inning, Buchanan faced 14 batters, retired two and allowed 11 to score. That's certainly unique, if we're being charitable.

Silver linings... lessee... Chase Utley was 2 for 4, and now 7 for 17 since his recall. Maikel Franco was hit hard on the forearm or wrist by a pitch in the first, but x-rays were negative. Oh, this is a nice one: The Phillies have recaptured the worst record in baseball, with their 69th loss.


Ok, folks, I got nothing else. It's late and this game sucked. I'm gonna go clean the Augean stables now.