Let’s buy him some meat: Marlins 2, Phillies 1

Let’s start with the obvious praise from tonight’s game. Vince Velasquez was as good as he’s been since April, going seven innings and allowing just three hits. He walked four, but none of them led to runs. In fact, the only run that Vinny allowed was a home run from Christian Yelich, a no doubter that landed in the seats in right center field. It was a great performance, and one that Vinny needed.

Vinny is actually in very good company.

Thank god.

Now for a few great things. In the third inning, Freddy Galvis and Cesar Hernandez made a truly spectacular double play.

Oh man that’s wonderful. I also love how Freddy’s hat is barely keeping his hair at bay. It’s like it could pop off at any moment, revealing his enormous, glorious afro.

In the bottom of the fourth Tommy Joseph tied the game up with an ENORMOUS, HUGE, INCREDIBLY LARGE HOME RUN. Citizens Bank Park could barely contain it. It was massive.

And that’s where the action really stopped.

In the bottom of the seventh, I got really angry. Ryan Howard was pinch hitting for Velasquez, and with one out and to men on he took three straight balls.

Then what do you think he did?

AAAAAUUUUGGGGHHH WHY DID YOU SWING AT THAT? WHY? IT LOOKED LIKE BALL 4! AND EVEN IF IT WASN’T YOU WOULD STILL HAVE TWO OTHER STRIKES TO FUCK UP IF YOU WANTED! JUST TAKE THE PITCH! MAKE THE PITCHER THROW YOU A STRIKE!

David Phelps, who walked the bases loaded, and who’d gotten Ryan Howard to swing his way into an out after a 3-0 count, struck out Peter Bourjos. Yeah, I was angry.

In the ninth, Freddy Galvis got the first out by swinging at a pitch up by his ears. Cesar Hernandez swung at literally the first pitch he saw from Mike Dunn. Andres Blanco at least saw three pitches. But the inning was over and they went into extras.

Maybe 60 seconds into extra innings, Odubel Herrera poorly read a fly ball from Adeiny Hechavarria. But Maikel Franco, oh Maikel Franco, he made me forget it all. And I’d be able to show you his amazing grab if the Phillies twitter account would wake up and post things in a timely manner, or if MLBAM would stop being asshats about posting gifs. But if you want to take a look at it, hit up Long_Drive’s twitter account. I’ll even give you the link.

It was all for nothing, though. In the top of the tenth, after that great play from Maikel, Martin Prado walked and David Hernandez was pulled from the game. Daniel Stumpf, who is still on this team for some reason, replaced him. He let his inherited runner score, and of course the Phillies couldn’t score in the bottom of the inning.

They lost the game, in extra innings for the second night in a row. It sucks just as much as it did last night.