Good Lord I hate the Mets. I hate them with my entire being. With my entire soul, and the souls of my future children, and their children, and their children after that. I hate them so strongly and so deeply that generations from now, people will be talking about the depth and breadth of my hate.
I hate the Mets so much that I called yesterday’s game thread a game recap. That’s how much I hate them!
We could keep talking about my hatred, but let’s get to the news.
Vince Velasquez had the start he needed to have
Loss or not, Vinny V had a fantastic start. Please read LTG’s game recap, it has many great words about that. Vinny went six innings, he kept his pitch count under control, and took a shutout into the sixth inning. Things came tumbling down after that, thanks to Jay Bruce (more on that in a moment), but it was exactly what he needed. And to top it all off, he did this.
Vince Velasquez, probably the Phillies' best-hitting pitcher, collects his first big-league RBI which also happens to give them the lead.— Meghan Montemurro (@M_Montemurro) April 20, 2017
LONG LIVE VINNY V.
Jay Bruce is a fart face
I’m not sure I need to say much to justify this, but here are a few tweets to help you understand why Jay Bruce’s face, and perhaps his entire body, is made of farts.
Breaking News: Jay Bruce is history’s greatest monster
I was actually mistaken before. Jay Bruce isn’t just a fart face. HE’S THE WORST THING TO EVER HAPPEN TO THE UNIVERSE.
I hate this guy so much. And I hate whoever gave him that stupid costume. SOMEONE TELL ME WHICH METS PLAYER GAVE HIM THAT STUPID SHIT SO I MAY RELEASE A NEVER ENDING TORRENT OF MOCKING AND INSULTS UPON HIM.
Maikel Franco is having some trouble
I don’t have much to say here other than this.
Woof. Come back, Old Maikel.
A few more links for you
- Ben Lively and Mark Leiter Jr. got called up to the Phillies, both for the first time. CSNPhilly’s Jim Salisbury wrote some good words about it.
- Philly.com’s David Murphy wrote about Cesar Hernandez, possible Phillies second baseman of the future.
Tweet of the day
Those bats are amazing.