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The Offseason: 2/12/2021

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Things continue coming together, thumbing their noses at entropy

Miami Marlins v Philadelphia Phillies
Did you know Bamboo is recyclable?
Photo by Rich Schultz/Getty Images

In the latest episode of Effectively Wild I learned that lots of people believe that MLB umpires are required to wear black underwear in case their pants split. (Google it.) It’s definitely not true. But I’d never thought about the umpires’ underwear before. Aside from Joe West, MLB umpires maintain low profiles and barely have visible personalities. But they must have them. Maybe all that personality gets sublimated into, like, technicolor dream briefs? If I were an ump it would certainly help me stay placid as an irate manager shed spittle into my clenched maw. Just a thought and a chuckle trapped just behind my teeth.

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