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Commercial fun with John Kruk

Want to own a piece of John Kruk’s soul?

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Championship Series - Arizona Diamondbacks v. Philadelphia Phillies - Game Seven
The Krukker wants you to own a piece of the Vet
Photo by Mary DeCicco/MLB Photos via Getty Images

In 2003, after 33 seasons of mostly bad baseball combined with awful ambience, the Phillies were getting ready to leave Veterans Stadium behind. Citizens Bank Park was under construction, and the Vet would be demolished soon after. Before the demolition, the Phillies figured they should make some money off the old place and give fans some memories of the good(?) times.

Thus, they began selling off seats from the Vet. And who better to advertise the sale of said seats than John Kruk? After all, if he can fit into one of the seats, surely your own posterior should be able to squeeze in.

The commercial gets a little disturbing when Kruk says that owning a seat is like owning a piece of his soul. I’m willing to bet they got that shot with one take.

Each pair of seats comes with a certificate of authenticity which is a nice touch, but probably completely unnecessary. Stadium capacity for baseball was over 56,000 for baseball. It seems safe to say that anybody who wanted to buy seats was able to do so, and this wasn’t exactly something that the bootleggers were going to be at hard work replicating.

Checking on EBay, the prices vary, but you should be able to get yourself some for less than $1000. Does anyone know where you can buy the original rainbow-colored seats from the 70’s and 80’s? Now those might be worth having in your house!

Taste the rainbow

Kruk then wipes the seat and licks his fingers, and I’m pretty sure my mother once yelled at me for doing that. Speaking of mustard, that reminds me of the time when my parents took my friend and I to a game. The on-field action was not keeping us suitably entertained, so we grabbed a bunch of mustard packets, put them on the concrete steps, and jumped on them.

What can I say? The Phillies teams of my youth largely sucked, and we needed some way to entertain ourselves.

That’s all for today. Be sure to check back on the site tomorrow, because the people have spoken, and my next post will be about...The Hamburglar!